Migzer

     Alright, I'm taking a break from recalling painful memories (because you know, I'm just pining to get back to that), to tell you all about what is going on with Migzer.


     After he made this post I immediately started frantically running all over the city to try and find him. It wasn't too hard, considering the fact that he was practically screaming, and having his voice reach an all-time high, I'm pretty sure that anyone within a 10-mile radius would be able to hear him.

     When I did find him, he was huddled up in the corner of a long alleyway. There was a police officer there with him (I'm assuming he got called in for noise complaints) trying to coax him into getting up and heading back to the station with him. Though I doubt Migz even knew he was there. He just continued screaming "MAKE IT STOP!" over and over again. I quickly intervened.

     "Connor! There you are!" I ran up to the two and gave Migz a hug. "I was wondering where you had run off to! Come on, let's get you back to your room."

      "Do you know this man, ma'am?" Asked the police officer, giving me a weird look.

      "Oh yes! This is one of my patients from the mental health facility, Mr. Connor MacLeod. He's a bit of an escape artist, this one!" I giggled and took his shoulders and shook them... a little too hard, now that I think about it. "I'm sorry for the trouble he's caused you officer, we'll be on our way now!" I hoisted him up onto my shoulders and began to walk down the alleyway.

      "Wait just a moment!" I heard the police officer call. I'm pretty sure it took him a bit to make sense of what I had just said. I turned around, "Yes?"

      "Aren't you a little young to be a fully-fledged doctor? And as a matter of fact, where's your uniform?" He gave me a suspicious look.

      "Oh, you young police officers~! You sure know how to flatter an old gal like me! I'm sorry sonny, I'm afraid you're not quite the right age for me just yet. And as for my uniform, well... It wasn't technically my shift, but I got a call from an associate of mine saying that little Connor had gotten away again, and he had last been seen around my neck of the woods. You know how these things are, right, Mr. Big Bad Police Officer?" I gave him a flirty wink. Suddenly, his walkie-talkie went off. He had barely pulled it out of his pocket before apologizing for the misunderstanding and taking off back to his cruiser.

     I set Migz back onto the ground and slumped next to him. He had kept up the screaming through my entire "Horny Old Lady" Schtick, and was still going non-stop. Migz, if you ever read this, you've got a good set of lungs there, my friend. I tried everything to get him back to the real world; slapping him, shouting at him, and kicking him in the gut. Strangely, none of these things seemed to have any effect on him whatsoever.

     I slumped back down on the ground and started scanning the area for any blunt object I could use to maybe hit him with. This is when I finally got a good look at the alleyway around me. No windows, no doors, no trash cans, no garbage lying around. It was oddly clean. Well, of course, besides all the graffiti on the walls that repeated Migzer's real name (which I'm not even going to bother trying to write down... or even pronounce for that matter), and the words "Unlock the Truth" over and over again.

    I turned back to look at Migz. Well, he had certainly unlocked the truth alright, and I suppose it wasn't exactly all sunshines and rainbows when he did. Now the issue is finding out exactly what it was he discovered, and who I need to kill in order to do it. Oh yeah, and getting him back to the land of sanity. That too.




    ... Anyone have any ideas?

Quoth the Raven Part 3

     I'm not sure exactly when I'm gonna finish this post, or when it will go up, I'm kinda busy with helping Migz figure out who the hell he saw in the alley.



     Judy's face went completely white. Scarlett smiled at her and very kindly asked "Would you have a car by any chance? Mommy?" She nodded. Scarlett used her gun to motion her to the car port.

     Judy opened up the garage door and climbed in the drivers seat, her face still white with fear. Scarlett instructed me to sit in the passengers seat, while she went and sat behind Judy, still holding the gun at her. I felt this increasing feeling of... wrongness... the whole time we were in the car. I kept my face pressed against the window, as if I was trying to get out. But I remember what they said to each other.

     "Where do you want me... to take you?"

     "Where do you think?" She still sounded so polite and kind.

     "..."

     "Our old house, silly! Remember all the fun times we used to have there? Remember? Before we moved to the big city and you fucked all those kind gentlemen? Before you went completely batshit insane? Before you completely forgot about me? Before Raven was born?"

      I heard Judy sniffle, her next words were clouded in tears.

     "Oh God! What are you gonna do to me?"

     "What's wrong mommy? Don't you wanna relive the old days?"

      She began sobbing harder than ever.

     "Please don't do this! Please! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"


     I heard a small giggle come from Scarlett. Then there was nothing but silence for the next couple of hours, silence only broken by the sounds of Judy's sobbing.




     Finally, we arrived. I could feel Judy trembling harder than ever as we came to a stop. I looked around. We were at an old abandoned farm house, surrounded by a giant, dying cornfield.

     "Well, go on in." chimed Scarlett, still smiling like a kid in a candy store. Judy and I both got out of our seats. Scarlett took my hand and let Judy lead us into the run down old shack. No, before you ask, this farmhouse was different from the one in the Loop.



It was bigger... slightly.



      Anyways, when we got inside, Scarlett began dancing around and twirling, as if she was five years old again. "It's perfect! It's just like it was before, isn't it mommy?" Judy awkwardly sat down on a dusty old chair, looking very uncomfortable. "Why did you make me bring you two here?" She asked, shooting a stinging glance at me. I felt as if that look she gave me, even though it lasted barely a second, meant that I was somehow to blame for all this. I suddenly didn't want to be there anymore. I tugged at the hem of Scarlett's dress "Sis... I wanna go home... I'm scared..." She looked down at me and smiled, "Don't worry Raven, we're gonna have fun! Okay?"

     She pulled our her handgun again, and casually shot Judy in the leg. I closed my eyes and turned away as she let let out a blood curdling scream that would haunt my nightmares for many years. I heard Scarlett walk over to her and do... I don't wanna know what she did really. All the while I heard sounds of screaming, and felt a tiny bit of warm blood splash onto my back. At some point I felt my way into a corner and stayed there, covering my ears until Scarlett grabbed me by the shoulder and turned me around to look at the bloody pulp that was our mother. She was still breathing.

     She smiled. "Your turn."

     She handed then gun over to me. "Finish the job."

     I looked down at the broken and bloody mess on the ground. The leg that was shot was now halfway across the room. The other one was so broken and mangled... I don't wanna think about the rest. Scarlett helped me hold the gun to make sure I had a good aim.

     "Do it."

      I felt a rush of fear when she said that. I stood there frozen. I didn't know much, being a child. But one thing I knew for sure was that killing people was wrong.




Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. 




     "DO IT!"


Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. 


     I felt a surge of fear, like electricity, that was so over whelming that it made all my muscles immediately tense up. I had no time to stop myself before I pulled the trigger.









Wrong...?




     "See? Don't you feel better now?"

     I said nothing, staring in awe at the lifeless hunk of meat before me, wondering what I had just done. I turned to look up at Scarlett, who was smiling down at me. I felt nothing.

It was so easy. What's so wrong about killing people anyways?

      "Kinda."

      "Good. We have a lot of work ahead of us, you and I."


      She told me to go wait in the car as she cleaned up the mess, when she came back she sat in the driver's seat and took off. We swerved and swayed a lot during the long ride home. I guess she never got the chance to learn how to drive before she killed her dad. I keep thinking back to that time, and how I just sat there, staring out the window. Thinking nothing but of how easy taking a life was. And it did feel good... in a way.

      Before heading home we stopped at a dry cleaners to get ourselves cleaned up. Luckily, there was no one there but the staff, who were all but asleep, so no one questioned us when we walked in literally covered in blood.

      When we finally had our clothes dry and were back at my house, the sun was coming up. Scarlett instructed me to go straight to bed, and to tell anyone who asked that I got home at a much earlier hour. She then went back to the car. But before climbing in she turned her head towards me, smiled and said,

   

      "I'll be seeing you."



      She did end up seeing me again. And again, and again, and again. Same old story. Different "playmates." By the time I was around 9 years old, I had grown accustomed to her bimonthly visits, and almost kinda looked forward to them... in a way. But I was out of control. I was raised used to seeing death, believing that taking a person's life can be both fun and beneficial. Not knowing the repercussions. Only knowing that it's important to not get caught.

    One day, I had gotten to the point where I was so out of control, that when a girl that I went to school with starting poking fun at me, I snapped. I must've been used to criticism by then, but something about what she said just drew me over the edge. I waited until after school and followed her home. I made note of the address, then I went back home and called Scarlett.


    "Well, well, well. If it isn't my favourite little sister! What can I do for you?"


    "Hey Scar! You'll never guess what I found for us today!"

   
    "... Is it another new playmate?"


    "Uh-huh! And I wrote down her address and everything for you!"


    "Perfect! You're really getting the hang of this, aren't you Rave?"


     That night, we went over to her house and grabbed her from her room. Then we took her back to the farmhouse to kill her. As I said, I had gotten used to Scarlett killing people, and then me delivering the final blow. Just your average night for me.



     But the next day was very different. I had never witnessed any sort of emotional response to death besides joy before; and the girl we killed... I didn't think anyone would miss her. But that day... people were in tears. I had never seen anything like it. Kids in my class... her friends... her best friends... I couldn't stand it. They kept having to leave the room to cry out in the hall. For the first time I felt... disgusting... evil.

     Durring recess, I decided to go up to one and ask what she was so upset about. It was common news all over the school that the girl had gone missing, and the fact that I was asking one of her best friends what was wrong, caused a couple of heads to turn. She screamed in my face. I don't know what she said, and it didn't matter. The amount of emotion that was caused over the death of one small, insignificant person overwhelmed me. I turned and walked away from her, and as soon as I was out of everyone's sight, I hopped the fence and ran to my house.

   




Oh geez, long post is long. I shall finish the story... hopefully tomorrow... possibly later. I'm a little drained right now. That was a lot of recalling of old memories that I just did for you guys, and I'm all cried out.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go cry some more to Migz! :D






    

 

Quoth the Raven Part 2

     Sorry I didn't upload this yesterday. Writing that last post just... I needed a break is all. Anyways:



     Yes, Scarlett came for me next. Not to kill me though, no. She wanted to save me. I guess after living all those years, knowing nothing but loneliness and anger, she managed to convince herself that nothing else existed. Nothing else but the brief moment of bliss that came to her when she took her father's life. She must've figured that I was no better off than her, and I deserved a chance to feel that feeling of overwhelming satisfaction.

     The day I first met her... It's so vivid and strong in my mind, as if it had just happened a couple of minutes ago. I remember I was in the basement playing on my NES with my brother, though, I didn't really know what I was doing. I remember hearing a knock on my door. I figured it was just one of the neighbours or a relative stopping in for a visit. I normally would've gotten up and rushed to see who it was, but I was in the 'zone' at that moment. I could hear my dad answering the door. I didn't hear another word after that until I heard him calling for me to come upstairs. He used that tone of voice that I only ever hear when I was in trouble, so I paused my game and went up the stairs as slowly as possible. I remember noticing a very strong silence over the whole house, but at the time I figured that it had something to do with my overwhelming sense of fear.

     When I had finally made it to the door, I noticed a very calm yet, very unsure look on my father's face. I looked at the woman in the door. My first thought was that she was very pretty, and therefore she must've been a very nice person. I had somehow ingested that message from watching Beauty and the Beast, can't say I know why. She must've noticed me looking up at her with all kinds of curiosity in my eyes, because she smiled at me. I smiled back. At the time, I thought that smile meant something good. I thought it meant I had made a new playmate. If only I had known what it's real purpose was.

     My father spoke; "Raven..." I looked down at the floor. He was using that tone of voice again. "There's something we've been meaning to tell you..." as he said this, I realized that he wasn't angry at me, but I had the feeling I was in for some very bad news. I continued to stare at the floor. "We wanted to wait until you were older, but I suppose..." He paused, I assumed he was shooting a glance over at the lady. "... I suppose there's really no point in hiding it now." I looked up at him. I had never seen him look like this before, I was more curious than frightened now. "Raven, this... this is your sister Scarlett." I felt both relieved and happy. I had always wanted a sister.

     Both my father and Scarlett went on to explain how I came to be, and how I ended up where I was. I more or less understood what they were talking about. I just continued nodding my head and smiling at Scarlett whenever I got the chance. When they were confidant that I understood she finally asked "So, the reason I came here was because I just missed my little sister, and I was wondering if I could maybe spend a day or two with her?"

     My parents quickly agreed, saying that we could spend as much time as we need to catch up. I remember that we took the bus to get around, because my parents never let me on the bus, I was very excited. We rode around town all day. She took me to a store and bought me some ice cream and a teddy bear, which I burned years later. Finally, when it was starting to get late out, Scarlett said that we had to go to one more stop before heading back to her place.

     "We're picking up our new playmate." She smiled. "You've never met our mother before, have you Raven?" I shook my head. "Well, would you like to?" I nodded. At the time, I didn't understand why our mother kicked us out. I thought that maybe once we were all back together, we could all live at my house and happily ever after. Childhood ignorance. Gotta love it.

     We came to our last stop. Some old slum in the east side of town. I found it a little intimidating, but I managed to occupy my brain with the thought of finally meeting my mother. I remember walking down there, probably with the stupidest smile on my chocolate-covered face. Considering how ridiculous I must've looked, and the fact that Scarlett was wearing a bright, lacy spring dress, I don't think we exactly blended in with the rest of the people there, who were giving us odd looks.

     We finally arrived at a run-down looking townhouse, complete with smashed windows, bricks that had fallen off, incomprehensible graffiti and of course, the classic bullet holes in the front door. Scarlett knocked on the door and whispered to me, "This is where the real fun begins!" She had said it in such a way that even in my ignorant 6 year-old mind I was thinking that something wasn't quite right with how she said it.

      The door was answered by a grumbling middle-aged woman. I remember the distinct smell of alcohol, and something else that kind of smelled like skunk. Despite her old age, she was wearing extremely high heels and very revealing clothing. What must've used to be very vibrant red hair was now faded into a dull sort of pink. She first looked at Scarlett, then down at me. "Oh... you two... Whaddya want?" she groaned. Scarlett just smiled, "I think it's time for a family reunion, don't you?" She then reached into her purse and pulled out what looked like a small handgun.


Bleh, I don't have time to write anymore. I'll try and wrap this up tomorrow. It's taking longer than I thought.
 

Quoth the Raven Part 1

     Hey, sorry this has taken so long to post up, but I haven't had much time to really write about anything, much less something as difficult as this is going to be. Sorry if things don't make much sense in this either, Migz and I have been traveling around non-stop as of late, so I'm rather tired. Some good news is that my Slender-sickness finally subsided! So there's something (and yes, Raggedy, I have some of that sludge shit saved for you. It was surprising easily contained).

   

     Well, no point in wasting any more time. Migz, if I randomly burst into hysteric tears, this is why.


 
     This basically all started the day I was born. I very briefly lived in a tiny home with both my elder sister, Scarlett Rose and my mother, Judy Rose. My mother was... well, she was a whore, to put it bluntly. She never had a great liking for children, even my sister, who she had somehow put up with for ten whole years. But when I was born, I guess something in her mind just snapped. For the short amount of time I was with her, I was never fed, treated terribly, and she had even given me an insulting name; "Raven," which I have since had legally changed for... well, we'll get to that later. She named me after that famous poem The Raven, in which the bird is depicted as a sort of tormenter, a "bird of the devil," and I guess that's what she thought of me.

     And when I say I very briefly lived there, I mean it. I don't even remember the house or what my mother looked like. Almost a week into my life, she had kicked my sister and I out. Luckily, Scarlett decided to do the smart thing and ask our fathers to hopefully take us in. We first went to her father; a very successful business man who had a wife but no children. He said he'd be glad to take one of us in, but they didn't want more than one child in the house. He was both kind and greedy, but kindness can be expensive. And I guess in the world of business, greed always comes first. This meant that we had to go and talk to my father; a middle class working man with a wife and a son. Lucky for me, he was a moderately kind man, and willing to take me in; regardless of the fact that his family would know he cheated.

     For about 6 years I lived happily with that family. I never knew anything about my mother or my sister, or what had become of either of them. Besides my bright red hair, I looked just like my father. I had no reason to think I was any different from them. I was happy. I was a happy ignorant child, spoiled beyond her wildest dreams and unaware of the terrors of the real world. I can't remember a time I was happier than I was those first 6 years of my life.

     As for Scarlett, things were very different. She didn't have the blessing of a fading infant's memory.  She clearly remembered how terrible our moth... Judy was to her for all those years. She was constantly neglected and abused; either by Judy herself, or her "clients." Things didn't get much better at her new home either. Her father and his wife were barely ever home. She was constantly by herself, and she was too shy to make any friends at school. She got picked on so much that it got to the point were she had to be home schooled.

     Eventually, her father and his wife got divorced. The wife didn't want to have to spend all her money taking care of her, so she was left with her father and a nanny. Things only got worse from there. Her father had stopped coming home from work, only showing up maybe once a week smelling like booze, sweat, and god knows what else. The man who had been homeschooling her left as soon as he had stopped being payed, and the nanny just left one day and never returned. Scarlett was completely alone.

     Around the time she turned 14, she started lashing out. During her father's absences, she would turn furniture, break antiques, smash windows, and tear out door and walls. I don't know why, but she was never punished for this. My guess is that her father was either too busy or too high to notice. So the violence in her heart escalated to the point where she took Buds, her father's pet cat, skinned him alive, ripped off all of his limbs, and left him to bleed to death in her father's room. The sight of it when he finally came home must've given him a heart attack. Finally, he was convinced she needed help and sent her to an institution. However, she quickly escaped, and the loneliness and anger in her heart had built up so much that she went back to her father's house, and waited for him to come home.

     On the day he finally showed up, she hid in the basement as she knew his exact schedule for whenever he was home; shower, eat, go to bed. She waited a couple hours down there until she was confidant that he was asleep. Then, she took the knife that he had used to cut his steak, slowly climbed the stairs to his bedroom, crept over to his bedside, and cut out his throat. Once he was dead, she wanted to make sure she left a nice, big mess for the police to find. She separated him into what must've been a million tiny pieces, and scattered him all over his newly refurnished house.

   


     But she didn't want to stop there.



I'll continue the rest of this, perhaps tomorrow. It's hard... reliving these memories, even if they aren't mine. No, I haven't even gotten to the good part yet.

Enough of These Corny Puns

     Ugh, man I feel like shit. Ever since I woke up this morning I've been puking up this weird black tar shit. What's it called? Slendersludge or something? Well, it could use a little salt. Thankfully, I think my stomach's calmed down enough for me to explain a bit about what happened last night (or at least, what I think was last night). I don't really know what happened after I blacked out, but Migzer put up a post about it, so you can read his interpretation of it there.

     So, as I mentioned before, I foolishly ran head-long into a looped-up cornfield in a sad attempt to get away from... whatever the hell was staring at me. Ugh, I feel like such a dumbass. I mean, I was perfectly safe indoors, what was I thinking? Anyways, everything around me felt like it was standing still, except for the wind, there was a constant gust of it coming from all directions that, with every passing second, seemed to carry a scream or two on it. I'm starting to wonder if any of those scream were mine. They all sounded so familiar.

     After I made my last post, I decided that the only way I would figure this out is if I maybe walked in the direction of where the screams were coming from. Yeah, bad idea. I know. But I didn't want to be aimlessly running around a never-ending plane of existence if I had no idea what I was running from. And as I got closer, the screams became louder and clearer. Eventually, I realized that they weren't just meaningless sounds. I realized that they were actually screaming something at me.

    I eventually found the source of the screams. I didn't like it, but I found it. A bunch of hooded figures lying on the ground, rolling around and twitching like a bunch of madmen. Yeah, this stuff came out of my freaking nightmares. And when I got close enough, I was able to make out what they were saying. Things like "STOP KILLING US" "MURDERER!" "WHY DID YOU KILL ME?" "I DON'T WANT TO DIE!"

    At that moment, I realized where I heard those voices before. But I don't have the energy to write, or even think about it right now.

     The hooded victims had begun to rise from the ground when they saw me coming near. As I got closer, I could see that they were brandishing what looked like farming tools. I stopped in my tracks, hoping that they might stop too, but they had begun to slowly inch towards me with no signs of stopping. And even as they had begun to lift up their weapons, ever so slowly inching towards me, they wouldn't stop screaming for their lives. Even as the expressions on their faces changed from fear to anger and determination. They had me surrounded, they were slowly closing in on me, holding their weapons high in the air with what seemed to be nothing but vengeance in their minds...

     And that's all I remember. Next thing I know, it's daylight and I'm on the same rooftop I was on before. I sit up and look to see someone standing over me, asking how I was doing. I try to respond, but as soon as I open my mouth my stomach lurches and I hurl out a bunch of tar-ish black shit. By the time I'm able to talk, Migz had already left and came back with a bottle of water. I of course thanked him for saving my hide. Apparently Phobos was there too? No clue what happened to him. I supposed I'll check his blog later on, when I'm feeling up to it.

     For now, I think I'm just gonna lay low for a week or so. Don't expect to hear much from me for a while. I need some serious downtime after that nightmare.


When I'm ready, I promise I'll explain everything.

████████████this place is actually ve████████████ting. I feel... almost at home. It's just l████████████████████████████████████saved my li████████████████████████████████████

Yes... I thi████████████used to this place. I kinda enjoy the screaming. It reminds me of s sim████████████ime. Back when I mur████████████le with my favourite si████████████elt like I could take on the world. Make them scre████████████ay. I can finally kill again.

Don't you remember Julia? Remember ████████████d times? Remember when YOU KILLED ME Y████████████ING WHORE! I'LL KILL YOU ████████████OU I'LL KILL YOU! SLOWLY AND PAIN████████████ke how you killed me. I hope you████████████████████████ents my beloved sister. I will ████████████d I will kill you!

Why I Hate Corn

     Umm... So... Has it been, like, insanely dark outside all day for anyone else?
 
     Seriously, why haven't I seen the sun for the past, like 10 hours? I mean, last I checked it was morning. I'm checking again and... It's still morning...? Has it really been only and hour since my last post? What time is it?

     Wait... why are the hands on my watch moving back and forth like a goddamn metronome? WHERE THE HELL AM I??


           kill


     Oh yeah, so you guys are probably wondering what the hell happened to me in my last post. Well, since I doubt I'll be getting out of here any time soon, I guess I have a chance to explain in a bit more detail.

     So, a couple nights ago (at least... I think it was only a couple) I was setting up camp on some random rooftop, as you do, preparing to get some regular ol' shuteye. I fall asleep, have a terribly realistic nightmare (which I will not go into detail with), and wake up on an old rotting and dusty floor in some abandoned old house in the middle of no where. I have no idea where I am, and the sun is out. East. Morning. So, I do what any regular blogger does: Pull out my laptop, quickly jot down my surroundings and post it up for future reference. Though, I guess it isn't really much use to me, seeing as it barely says anything, besides the whole cornfield thing. Hell, I could tell you the same thing right now, considering I'm freaking trapped inside of it with no hope for escape thus far.



judge



     Anyways, as I was writing my observations, I looked out the window and noticed that someone was staring back at me. I quickly finished up my post and got up for a closer inspection. By the time I had everything packed up and put away, the person had walked right up to the window. The first thing I noticed about this person was their eyes. I don't know why, but whenever I think back to those moments, when our eyes met, I feel an overwhelming sense of dread. Their eyes were so full of fear and hatred and I just... I felt the same way I felt when I...




               



                                    maim


   



     Never mind.


     I was just... just scared, and I felt like... like I had to get out of there. So I grabbed my stuff, bolted out the door and went crashing through the cornfield. Several seconds after the fact, I came to the stunning realization that perhaps blindly running through the creepy cornfield might actually be a very bad idea. Luckily, I had only run a couple meters in so it would be very easy to just turn around and...


     Where the hell did the house go?


     Yeah, that didn't go as planned. I don't know how or why, but when I turned around to walk back, it was like I had run miles into the damn thing! The house was no where in sight, and there was no visible exit anywhere near by and... was it just me? No. I was certain the sun was not that low in the sky several seconds before! It was just morning! Now it's evening? TIME DOES NOT WORK LIKE THAT


   
            slay



     So, here I am now, several hours(?) later; trapped in a never ending cornfield with nothing but the corn to keep me company. Oh, and did I mention it's dark? Because it's fucking dark. 

     



                                             DIE



  

     Ugh, I honestly thought that writing down everything that has gone on here would help me calm down a bit, but the more I think about it, the less sense it makes. This is definitely not good for my anxiety levels.



   Oh yeah, did I forget to mention that ever since I got here, I've heard nothing but screaming? Yeah. Nothing but endless lamentations for the past godknowshowmany hours. Many different voices too; I guess it adds variety. They also all sound really familiar; but I can't quite place where I've heard them before. Same thing goes with that person I saw before. He was so familiar. In fact, something about this whole place is really familiar, but I can't put my finger on where I've seen all of this, and quite frankly,





I really don't want to.

Weird Shit

     I'm held over in an abandoned farm house right now. Not sure where I am or how I got here, but I'm taking this time to relax for a day or so. Besides, I'm honestly creeped the fuck out by this corn field. Like, the wind is blowing, but it's not moving, like... I don't know. I wanna go outside to check it out, but I have a really bad feeling about it.

     I'll try to explain bit more when I'm not held over staring at the corn. I just know someth


there;s a person out there

Life On the Road

     I gotta say, it's not as bad as I thought it would be. I mean, sure I'm not really eating as much as I should anymore, and my life has certainly dropped in consistency levels (Y'know, not being able to have any contact with loved ones anymore). But despite that, I actually kinda like it. I love adventuring and discovering new places I've never been before, fighting to the death with untold horrors, knowing I could die at any minute. It's just so... thrilling! You'd think from previous events in my life that I'd be all adventured out (or not, considering I'm NEVER talking about that again), But I'm actually having a blast! Plus, I've been getting wondrous amounts of sleep since I left! I am a very happy camper indeed!

     Anyways, having said that, I still don't really have a good action plan just yet. As I've said before, I'm not all too fond of the idea of just running around like a headless chicken. Though I can guarantee that if I end up doing that, there is no chance in hell that I'm crossing the border. Canada is definitely a whole lot safer than the U.S since our police aren't corrupted.

 

     ...Well, they aren't corrupted by the Proxies, anyways.

   

     I was thinking of traveling over to Quebec and paying Migzer a visit. Though getting there would take quite a bit of time, considering the fact that I do not have a licence. I should probably head either in that direction or towards B.C anyways, since I hear the ocean is supposed to be safe or something. But the latter option would take a significantly longer time to get to, obviously. But the water is a lot warmer over there... hmmm... decisions, decisions.

     Oh well, I'm really not in any hurry. I guess for the time being I'll head in Migzers direction, and make B.C more of a long-term goal... Assuming I get there in one piece.

 

On the Move!

     Sorry folks, I know that I promised that I would post yesterday, but a couple of rather misfortunate events happened before I could.

     First off, not five minutes after I made my last post, the motel I was in was fucking swarmed with proxies. Or at least, I think it was. I just heard gunshots and a shit load of screaming throughout the building, so I just hightailed it out of there as soon as I could. I don't really know what happened, and I don't want to. I'm just glad I got a room with a window facing away from the street. I climbed out and took off down a (surprisingly long) dirt path.

     Well, as you can imagine, after that I was in no mood to actually see where my feet were taking me. I was just running as fast as I could, with a half-open backpack hanging from my shoulder. I didn't even realize where I had ended up until I got to the edge of a huge forest. I stopped and looked around for any alternative pathways out of my predicament, but I didn't have much time when I started to hear sounds of foot steps and shouting coming towards me. I decided it was time to have a little dance with fate, and booked it through the trees.

     Eventually, the sounds of running and shouting died down and I was pretty sure that I had given my pursuers the slip. Though, now there was another problem, and that of course was the fact that I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF A FUCKING FOREST. Not only that, but whilst in my state of panic, I decided that it was a good idea to get off the path and go bush-whacking instead. Luckily, I had stolen a pretty little blade from a friend of mine just for this type of situation. Unfortunately, I have about as much a sense of direction as one of those wind-up toy cars, so I was completely fucking lost. And a compass was, sadly, not on my list of things to bring when being hunted by psychopaths. Another problem was the fact that the sun was starting to go down, and it was about to get dark, really fast. And the denseness of the trees made the situation all the more worse.

     I could feel the panic starting to set in, and blundering my way through a dark forest was starting to sound more and more appealing as the minutes ticked by. I had to stop. I had to think. Think... think of it as a puzzle... Which problem to sort out first? I had no way of knowing which direction I was going, seemed like a good place to start.

     Figuring out puzzles has always been so calming to me. I'm really not sure why, but whenever I'm in a tough spot, I just think of it as a puzzle, organize all of the individual pieces, and put them into context by sorting them out in order.

     First puzzle problem; how do I figure out where I'm going? I wracked my brain for anything I knew about surviving in the wilderness.

     Well, start with the most basic. The sun rises in the east and sets in the west... The sun is currently setting... so most of the light is coming from behind me... And I clearly remember the sun was to my right when I got to the forest... So I came in from the north... I made a left turn when I got off the path...

     I jumped up from where I was sitting, turned around, and followed the sun back to the path. On my way, I noticed what an ample amount of destruction I had reigned as I had charged my way through there. Branches had been torn down, dirt kicked up, there was a really nice little pit in the ground where I had fallen during my mad scramble. Not to mention how freaking loud I must've been. Geez, I'm really lucky I got some distance from my pursuers before I tried that stunt. A whole small tree had been taken down whatisthisIdon'teven...

     Yes, well, I found the path again and I breathed a big sigh of relief. But I wasn't out in the clear yet, I mean, I couldn't go back the way I came. That was way too risky. I had to continue following the path southward until I found another exit. Luckily, despite my terrible sense of direction, I've spent a lot of time in forests in the duration of my short life, so I guess I had a bit of an advantage there.

     The path ended up twisting and turning a lot, so I got out on the east side as opposed to the south. Which is fine, plus the exit only took about twenty minutes to find, so I had managed to get out a little after dark.

     So, all in all, that probably could've gone a LOT worse. I feel VERY lucky to still have my skin and the rest of my organs in tact. Those were probably the most horrifying twenty minutes of my life. I mean, not knowing whether or not you're gonna survive... Knowing you could die at any minute... It's truly horrifying... And also very exciting at the same time. 

     Oh yes, and I didn't post yesterday because I was way too jumpy after that whole experience to stay at one place long enough to actually get something written. Don't worry though, things have calmed down quite a bit now, so I have time to figure out a strategy for myself that isn't just blindly running in all directions like a headless chicken.



     Until I come up with anything brilliant, I guess I'm done writing for today. Chow.

Now All the Really Bad Shit Happens

     I'm making this post from my laptop. I've left home. I know that i said I wouldn't, but I did.

     I've realized now that this is a problem that could end up with a lot more consequences besides just getting myself killed. I'm a threat to everyone that I care about. Everyone that I love. Just staying here and waiting for them to get infected, or risking them seeing him is the most selfish thing I could do. So I'm leaving.

     I realized this a couple days ago, when I was at my friends house. Now, since being stalked by Slendy doesn't exactly make you feel like you could take on the world, my friends have been rather concerned about the state of my mental health since this all began. They've constantly been questioning me on my sleeping habits, and have even gone as far as to asking me if someone's been abusing me or something. Luckily for me, it's a very easy topic to evade, as I don't normally go to my friends for advice on this kind of stuff anyways. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love my friends to death, and I would trust them with my life! It's just that, when it comes to personal stuff like this, I tend to rely more heavily on myself than on others to solve the problem. 

     Anyways, while I was at my friends house I noticed that something seemed really wrong about her expression. I don't know, something just seemed... off. So I asked her about it, and all I got was "Oh, I'm just a little distracted today." So, I continued to pester her until she finally spoke, and what she said made me open my eyes (I mean, REALLY open my eyes) to how much of a danger I really was to her, and everyone else. 

     "Seriously, [Name removed], tell me what's wrong."

      She sighed and looked at the ground for a moment.

     "There's a man following you." 

      I could feel my mind and body completely freeze up. "What?" I asked.

      She repeated herself. 

     "There's a man following you." She pointed at the window, and there HE was. 

      He was just... there! 

     Just... standing there... watching. 

     Always watching.

     "How long have you been seeing him?" I asked, panicking. I had to know, for obvious reasons.

     "Oh. Just now. But he's been around you longer, hasn't he?" her voice was starting to change. "You've had the symptoms for about about a month now." She now completely stopped sounding like herself.

     "He's been following you. Watching. Waiting. He wants you to join him. But you refuse. Why? He just wants to be friends, Julia. He wants to help you. He can save you. He can save you from your past. Don't you want that? He can help you forget. You won't ever have to think about it again. You won't ever have to worry about her again. Don't you want that? He can get rid of her. Don't you want that? 

Don't you want that?"

     I was frozen. I didn't know what to say. I've never told anyone about that. About her. How did she? How did he...?

     I had to get him out of her head! 

     So, I did the only thing I could think of at the time. 

     I put my hands on her shoulders, and smiled.

     She smiled back.

     Then, I leaned back, and with all of my strength, crashed my forehead right into hers. She fell back, her head was bleeding. And I could feel a couple droplets forming on my forehead as well.

     But, surprisingly, it worked.

     "Ow! What the fu-? Julia? What happened?" 

     I decided that it was best for her if I left, so I told her I had to leave, and to go and get some sleep, because she obviously wasn't feeling too well. On my way out I could here her rush to the bathroom to presumably puke up that slender gunk.

     Yes, it's definitely time for me to go.

     Another thing that I've realized is that Slender Man is no longer the only threat I have to worry about. I went for a walk yesterday to clear my head, and I noticed I was being followed. I never really expected to be a target for proxies, but I guess now, I am. And at the state I'm in right now, I think they're a bigger problem to me than even Mr. Slim. I mean, last night, I had a couple of them actually break into my house just to watch me as I tried to get to sleep. One thing that I don't get, though, is why they haven't made any moves yet. I mean, I'm completely vulnerable. I'm not a very fast runner, I can't fight to save my life, and I doubt I could actually out smart them, even if they are mindless drones.

     I'm willing to bet it's because I'm not 'ready' yet. Seriously, ever notice that all the Runners have had to reach a certain point of desperation or insanity before they were actually attacked? I would assume so. It's not like it's a big secret at this point...

     *Ahem* Right, back on topic. 

     So, I've holed myself in a quaint little motel for the night (with what little money I have) so I could take some time to plan out a strategy, or figure out what the best course of action is to take. I'll probably post again either later tonight or tomorrow or whenever I have something figured out.

     

     Fuck, my head hurts.