A Nifty Guide to Help Runners Not Die

     As I was going through the blogs, I noticed that everyone seems determined to help their fellow Runners stay alive. Now, I wouldn't consider myself a Runner, nor a Fighter. I'm really more of a piddling little girl who is pretty much fucked when the time comes for the shit to hit the fan. And even though I've found myself teetering on the idea of getting involved with the other bloggers due to the sheer fact that I just really hate people, I still feel like it's my duty to offer this one little pinch of advice. Mostly because I'd feel like a bit of an ass if I didn't.

     "So, what is this revolutionary idea that is sure to shake the foundations of the planet and make this war that much more winnable?" you may ask. Well first off, allow me to titty-slap you for the sake of hilarity. Secondly, I want to point out that this is not any sort of fighting advice, and it has a lot of down sides to it. It's just...

     Fuck, I hate writing intros, I always get carried away. I'll just get to the point.

     Basically, my idea for the Runners (and proxies, if you wish; I'm not taking sides) is for them to change their sleep schedule so that they're sleeping for a less amount of time, and spending more time fighting/running. I'd say you should sleep for about... 20-30 minutes every four to five hours.

     I know, I know, it sounds crazy. But it actually works! Let me explain:

     This is called the Uberman Sleep Schedule. Basically, it will help you get your REM sleep immediately so that you won't have to waste hours in an unrestful sleep, and it will give the enemy less of a chance to sneak up on you (plus it should help a bit with that nightmare problem that Runners tend to have). Basically, just set your alarm for half an hour after your planned bed time and you're ready to go! And then you just wait four hours, and repeat. Most people usually only get an hour and a half of REM sleep each night, while this sleep schedule will give you about 2 hours of it. So basically, you'll be getting even more rest than your average Joe, and will inevitably be able to operate a lot more efficiently.

     Now, there is a slight down side to this, nothing is perfect after all. For the first week and a half or so, you're gonna be, like, super sleep deprived. Unless you're some sort of super monkey hybrid, your brain is not going to adapt to this right away, and you will therefore not be getting any REM sleep. You may also begin to hate your life. But fear not! Once your brain agrees to go along with your new agenda, you'll be glad it did.

Aaaaand... that's all I got. I hope it helps someone out there. I don't plan on surviving this for very long, so this is really the least I can offer to the community.


Chow for now.

Intro and Tarot Cards

Figured I'd share a bit more with whatever viewers I may have here. I kinda realized that the information I gave about myself in my first post was mostly just fodder for your common internet pervert. So, I suppose if I'm ever going to get any kind of audience, they'd want to know a little more about the naive little girl who is trying to tell them what to do.

But before I begin, I just want to get one little thing off of my chest.

Before I posted my very first blog on here, I had read a bit of Seeking Truth and Make it Count, I was also an avid follower of MarbleHornets and stuff like that. But that was it. I really had no intention of getting myself wrapped up in this, regardless of my poor habit of sticking my nose where ought not be stuck. And I suppose I could come up with this grand story of how I decided to start my blog. I could say I had a sudden epiphany and threw caution to the winds in order to offer help to those who needed it and yadda yadda yadda...

Yeah, so the punchline is, I was completely drunk. Like, I'm talking hard-core shit-faced (don't look at me that way). I'm just thankful my perfectionist nature wasn't effected by the poison I had injected into my brain and I managed to actually form semi-coherent sentences. Though, I still find it a little hard to read for how overly-dramatic it is...

And to anyone who happens to read this and is a little worried about my poor habits, I'll have you know that I was taught I very good lesson the following day in hangovers, and I don't think I'm ever touching the stuff again.

Anyways, more about me. Well, hmm... not much worth mentioning. I'm really just your average teenager, struggling to find an identity. I've gone through several "phases" in my life, currently choosing to be an edgy punk-rocker. So far, my favourite style; I do love heavy metal, power metal more specifically. Basically, just picture your classic hard-core drummer girl and that's me in a nutshell. Or just take a quick glance at my profile picture. Either one.

On a side note, I also enjoy painting and acting. I really enjoy the Arts but I'm pretty sure trying to pursue a career in any of them would be a very bad idea. So I'm planning to either get a major in psychology, philosophy, anthropology, or sociology. I guess they really are all the same thing when it boils down to it; besides philosophy, of course. Though I only want a major in philosophy so I can write a book about it... eventually.

Now, as for my discovery of Slenderman, that started with a friend of mine, Jane (name changed, obviously). She was complaining to me about how the wits were scared right out of her and her brother, and how neither of them could sleep for a week. So I, having nerves of steel despite my overactive imagination, questioned her about it and she pointed me in the direction to Marble Hornets. I was so interested by the concept of this Slenderman creature, that I did a little bit of extra research on it. I look into Creepy Pasty, Know Your Meme, Wikipedia (I know, I know), and I eventually found myself reading a few blogs. Starting with Just Another Fool, then Damien's blog, then Zeke's, then Celeste's, then Zero's, then M's, and so on.

Then, one night I decided that I was depressed and was in desperate need of an alcohol, so I downed about half a bottle of Irish whiskey and got completely hammered. Woke up the next morning in front of my computer screen with my newly published blog staring me in the face. I of course immediately regretted it, but felt that it would be rather cowardly to just take it down, plus the idea of starting my own Slenderblog was a rather intriguing idea.

So, after a couple months of pondering the subject (granted, I WAS rather busy with other things), I have decided that I might as well continue what I've started whilst in my drunken stupor. And although I hadn't posted much on the blogs, I had been doing a lot behind the scenes, as I've mentioned before.

Also, after flipping through the notebook that Elaine had posted last year, I thought about all the superstitious mumbo-jumbo that my mother always talks about, and it got me thinking; Well, if I believe Slendy is real, then why not take it a step further? So I pulled out the tarot cards that I got for my 16th birthday. I figured I needed some sort of motivation to keep me going, and I'm not the best decision maker when it comes to big things such as... well, risking my own life for the sake of people I barely know... not that I mean to offend anyone. I'm sure you're all lovely.

So I decided to look into how to "Do the Tarot" I guess it would be called, and I found I fairly reasonable set up for decision making. I asked myself in my deepest heart of hearts if I should continue Slenderblogging. For anyone who cares, this is how it went:


Card 1                                         Card 3                           Card 4                                     Card 2
What would happen if I          An important aspect         The most important thing to   What would
didn't                                                                                consider                        happen if I did



So I guess you have to lay down the cards in the order of the numbers or something. I don't get why it can't just be in basic 1-2-3-4 order, but whatever. So, for anyone who's interested, this is what I got:

Card 1- Knight of Cups
If I put the meaning of the card into context with the set up, I guess it would mean that if I do not pursue this, than I would be giving up "The Water of My Soul," which is, I guess, my hunger for the truth. Which makes sense, I guess. I am a nosy little bugger when it comes down to it.

Card 2- The 10 of Wands
I'm pretty sure this one means that if I choose to pursue the truth behind Slendy, I'm going to be over-burdened. Which also makes sense, I guess. I do have a habit of putting myself up to challenges far beyond my level of capability. And I'm obviously going to be under great pressure to succeed because, well, I guess I would kinda die if I don't...

Card 3- The Two of Wands
The description of this card, I thought, fits my situation the best. It's basically saying that I'm "still protected by my encircled walls" and "I'm casting my gaze into the depths of the Universe" and "I'm laying my plans with care" which is an important aspect of this, I guess. I mean, do I really want to give up this safety? But I've already laid out my plans, and it's not like I totally hate the idea of being on the run, seeing the world with whole new eyes, adventuring to places I've never been before... but I digress. This is Slenderman we're talking about, after all.

Card 4- The Three of Wands
I really don't think I shuffled the deck enough. Three Wand cards, two in a row. a little too coincidental, but whatever. I'm pretty sure this card is telling me that the most important thing about this decision is that I AM open to change. Which is, once again, true. But it also says I should take my time and "listen to the winds" which I guess could only mean the warnings the Runners keep harping at me about, so... that's a thing. And I will "follow the waters that will carry my vessel to new shores" or something like that. Again, all the adventure stuff.

So... yeah. That's what I got from those cards. Though I find things like these are only handy to those with overly active imaginations, such as myself. I could very well be making it all up in my head, but who knows, really? What I do know is, for the time being, I'll stick to finding out as much as I can about this situation. And if it turns out that I get targeted, than so be it. And if it turns out people are actually reading this, than feel free to voice your opinion.

Chow for now.

Gibberish

So, the past couple of weeks have been pretty weird for me. I talked to a couple more Runners who came through here, and I noticed a general pattern.

"Don't get involved."

Every single one I've talked to has said those exact words in the same exact tone.

I find it very interesting that, despite being hounded by proxies and Mr. Slender, Runners seem to be a lot more concerned about the welfare of the unaffiliated. I really can't believe that this hasn't been addressed yet, but in all regards, thanks!

But anyways, going against any and all of those warnings, I've been using a lot of my free time to find out as much as I can about Slenderman (would you consider that one word, or two?), and reading blogs of Runners, whether they're dead or alive, trying to find a pattern in how they've survived, or died. So far, I'm still keeping to my theory that keeping a positive attitude and staying strong is the best way to tackle this situation...

Good God, I'm starting to sound like one of those overly-happy youth care workers.

But honestly, ever notice that the Runners who were killed by Slenderman himself seemed to have reached the point of complete insanity. Given, they had pretty much lost everything they held dear, and having ol' Faceless staring at them for days on end may have been a little hard on the psyche...

Ok, I'm clearly not getting anywhere with this. Let me just sum up what I think the best course of action would be for those being hunted:

1. Follow M's rules, but as it has been said, don't rely on them.

2. Venting your Slendy-related frustrations to loved ones is a HORRIBLE idea. Best to keep them out of it.

3. Regardless of whether you cared about them or not, Proxies are NOT humans. Their psyches have been warped to do His bidding. There's no getting them back. It would be easier for everyone if you just get rid of them when you get the chance.

4. Unless you think you're equipped to take him on, it would be best if you find the highest place you can, and just wait out the Solstice. Not everyone needs to be a hero when Slendy is at His worst.

Annnnnd that's all I have for now. It's not much, I may even just be stating the obvious, but hey, it's something. And if any wandering Runner happens upon this blog, and by the off chance finds help in it, then great! If not, well, at least it's something.

Like I've said before, I'm not Running, I'm not being hunted by Slenderman and his minions. I'm just your average kid trying to make a difference.