Can't Sleep

     Not like that's new.

     I said I'd live it up until shit started hitting the fan, and I'd probably be dead by then, so I really wasn't too convinced I was ever going to be really posting again. But hell, my thoughts are more jumbled than a desecrated rubix cube, so I figured I might as well write down a couple of things.


     I haven't had much sleep as of late, so I'm sorry if this isn't exactly coherent.


     I can't convince myself that this creature was just always there. I can't lead myself to believe that all mythological monsters are just... real. I mean, I know that Slendy obviously is, but... there's no such thing as the monster under the bed, right? I mean, come on people! We learned this when we were 5 year-olds! And I've been reading a whole bunch of crazy shit going on with the other bloggers too, what with all the rising from the grave, inter-demential travel, dream-riding, yadda yadda yadda yadda.

     I'm sorry guys but, get it together! Monsters don't just appear out of no where! Someone had to have planned it, right? And I'm pretty certain that all this talk about magic and fairy tales is what's driving these people to believe that they're in some sort of Loop, or they have acquired some sort of magical powers, or have been deluded into thinking they can actually stop this thing. This whole structure on how this issue is perceived is driving everyone into madness! Because if Slendy can do it, why not us, right?

     So, good people. I believe that it is high time to get our heads out from under the ground and look at this from a more realistic standpoint.


     I'm pretty sure that Slenderman and all the other Fears roaming around and terrorizing the planet are a bunch of experiments conducted by the U.S government that have gone completely wrong.


     I don't have much going on this theory quite yet, besides the sheer obvious and glaring fact that the U.S government is doing nothing to stop this, while other countries seem to remain completely clueless.

     I mean, think about it! Why are they doing nothing to stop this thing? I'm pretty sure that their reasoning lies far beyond just wanting to observe it and all that bullcrap! And if they were doing that, why not let the rest of the world's governments in on it too? Why does Parliament, here in Canada, have no clue as to what's going on? Why are the U.S officials so content to just sit back and watch while so many people are being brutally slaughtered, and only ever lifting a finger to keep everyone quiet about it?

     Well, it's obvious isn't it? They're testing their secret weapon of war on us! Remember the first Slenderblog? Just Another Fool. The dude's friend was in the military! They were testing the goddamn thing on their own goddamn troops, then it got outta hand when people started blogging about it, sharing the freaking operating symbols all over the internet, and infecting anyone who dare research it!

     You guys wanna know how Slendy was 'born' into this world? My theory is that the U.S government decided they need something stronger than the atomic bomb. They wanted to send a message to whomever dared challenge and/or oppose them. And one night, one of their 'higher ups' (most likely FISK) was bored of jerking off on the internet and decided to look up some spooky stories. That's when he came across Something Awful, and decided to share the story with the boys in the science department, and they figured that maybe the idea would be good for a couple of laughs. One experiment gone horribly wrong (or horribly right) later, and you got good ol' Slendy. And I'm pretty sure this is how the other Fears were created too. But that's as far as I'm gonna suspend my disbelief, people. I'm pretty sure that all this talk about dimensional Loops and shit are just figments of a poor Runners hallucinations.

     As for the Proxies, well... As I said (or, at least, I think I did), this is a work in progress so not everything is going to be air-tight. Like those weird ancient Brazilian drawings and stuff... Though I'm pretty sure that those are just coincidental.

    Anyways, I think it's high time for me to kiss Slendy goodnight and try desperately to get some shut-eye in preparation for yet another boring and uneventful day. (SO peeved that I can't go to ConBravo tomorrow)


Goodnight!